Captain America: The First Badass.

Well, the next Summer blockbuster is up.

God, how does that not look awesome?

Short version of the review: I recommend it. Long version of the review: Below.

If you saw Ironman 1&2 and Thor, I would recommend you see this. If you plan on seeing the Avengers film next year, you have no goddamn reason to skip this movie. Otherwise you are missing the point itself. In fact, a piece of the major plot revolves around the very-shiny-and-mysterious cuboid seen in the post-credits scene of Thor. 

Yeah, that thing. The Cosmic Cube. Have they flat-out said what this thing can do? I don't think the Captain America movie even knew what it was all about. 

Now, time to prod this movie with a mocking stick. Also, look out for some spoilers below. I won't be descrete about this. The movie starts with Steve Rogers doing his thing; trying to fight for his US of the America. Some character exposition happens, some more things, and then we are introduced to his best-friend-and-eventually-sidekickish friend Bucky. Sorry girls, he doesn't wear a domino mask in this movie and he isn't 14. More character exposition happens, bla bla bla, just sit back and enjoy.

Then comes the super soldier treatment. In every commercial I have seen for this movie up until it's opening, we see Rogers actually grow inside the giant metal taning bed, which was a really nice touch. It showed progression into the man he would become. Instead, we get blinding light and then he steps out all big-blonge-and-beautiful. Mm. 

Small thing that bothered me: they said that they were going to apply some serum to all of his major muscle groups. Then they only apply it to his biceps. Why didn't he walk out looking like a Tank from Left 4 Dead? A major hulk above the waist, and a tiny scarecrow of a man below. 

After all of this, other things happen. A nice chase scene with only one car involved, Nazi submarines and more. The good stuff. A little humor in there too; which I love. There was a nice little bit where Rogers was chasing down a car using his Adonis-body-from-five-minutes-ago, and he is so unfamiliar with his new form he accidentally turns too hard and crashes into a building. Brilliant. 

Bla bla bla. More stuff happens. Captain America gets three costumes in this movie, all of which are either ridiculously hilarious or down-right badass. Though, to be fair, the second is really a composite of the first and some stolen military gear. 

Then some shields happen, and the rest of the movie spends 40% of the screen time with that damn thing in the screen. 

Then he gets a badass motorcycle that does some tricky-awesome things straight out of Twisted Metal.

Damn, I need to wrap this up. Uh.

Hydra was awesome. Instead of just being a straight parallel to the Nazi army, they are the super devious research and development branch of the Nazi regime that eventually spirals out of control. Their weapons are devastating  and everything has a nice blue neon trim. Though their salute is downright humorous. 

Then Captain America and his rag-tag group of mercinary-soldiers of fortune crash the party and look damn good doing it. However, this is all in montage. I guess the videogames can pick up that slack, but damn, I would have loved to see them crush even more Nazi heads. 

Also more shield. 

Then more character development, some credits roll, and you see pure Marvel magik.

I misspelled that correctly, yes. 

Here is my theory for why everyone loves this: Steve Rogers represents the typical, under-physically-developed fan who wishes they were as big and strong as their favorite heroes. Instead of going to the gym and working up to that stature, Rogers gets it within a span of five minutes. Who wouldn't want that? What a slacker. 

Here is a link to my quick and thorough review of the movie on youtube.

Hm, I probably should have posted this first.

Like, comment and subscribe. It grows the brand. http://www.youtube.com/Heiru3

Also check out the twitterpage: http://twitter.com/#!/HJT





Oh, also. Best character in the movie: A young and suave Howard Stark.

What a majestic stache.

Return of The Venture Bros.

I love this show. 

It's brilliantly written, amazingly hilarious and is a polished parody about a past generation of animated series.
I remember when I was young, I would watch shows like the original Scooby-Doo and shows like Johnny Quest and the various Superhero shows.
Classic Cartoon Network, you know. They were more or less what my parents grew up on; or at least watched ironically.
Then my best friend shared this beauty of a show with me.
It was violent, cruel and held a sarcastic mirror up to that television history.
Mostly I stayed for the violence. Ultimately I fell in love with the theme of the show; failure.
The show is about what happens to our heroes of yesteryear when life throws them a hardball and beats them down. We've all been there.
Part of the original core of comedy is tragedy; we laugh when others fall. Comedy is pretty dark and sadistic if you think about it. At least the good humor is; mom-and-pop humor from the cold war isn't exactly entertaining any more, if it ever was.

I almost came when I heard The Venture Bros. was renewed for a new season.

Paging Dr. Deadpool....

Though it may seem like I'm a one-topic pony, this is actually a nice segway into my next post.

Remember when I discussed my love for the Dr. McNinja web comics?

Well it seems that my love for ninja-themed web action is getting eloped with my love of Marvel mercenary comics.

As a normal person would say, Chris Hastings of Dr. McNinja is going to write a story for Marvel's Deadpool!

It has to do with hammers. Get it? Hammer time. Yeah.

Personally, I can't wait. I'm ecstatic. Giddy. Hastings is an amazing writer, and perfectly captures the inexplainable mindset of these comics. The deranged humor, the impossible-yet-plausible plotline for stories like these, and the clever-yet-imaginative violence. Hastings is a professional at writing all three.

I don't care if you don't like comics, I don't care if you don't like me, but please. I beg of you. Give these a try. Spend the measly four dollars and buy the first comic when it comes out. Make the industry proud. Even if the market is swamped with Deadpool stories. (Didn't they recently cancel one? This seems counter productive.)

In case you can't tell, I happen to be a big Deadpool fan.

Did I mention that I once dressed up as Deadpool for Halloween?

One of my major obsessions...

Webcomics.

I'm fanatical about them. The last time I checked, I have almost 100 different sites bookmarked. Granted, they all don't update daily. Though I still shuffle through a good couple dozen each day, reading them.

Sometimes it feels like an addiction. Sadly there's no rehab for this.

There is a long list of why I love this medium. They're free, hilarious, and independent. Mostly. 

From time to time I will talk about some of my favorites; most you may have heard of, most you may not have. 

This week is brought to you by: Dr. McNinja.

The series is written and drawn by Christopher Hastings, and colored by Anthony Clark. When I say series, I mean a damn good ongoing one.

I was drawn in during my high school days, and still read it through college.

Is it confusing? Yes. I love that.

Is it ridiculous? Yes. I love that even more.

Amazingly they leave no plot holes, and introduce some of the most ridiculous characters and media commentary I've ever seen.

If you had to start reading somewhere, try the newest story arch: Found here.

Everything is pretty much explained as it goes along.

Just learn to accept that a giant gorilla with a pet cat (with an eye-patch) is driving the car.

Just roll with it.

Did I mention that I once dressed as the good Doctor for Halloween?

What luck, to find a gorilla in high school.